Saying Goodbye To First World Problems

Last week I had the misfortune of dropping my Iphone and breaking it with three months of my contract to go, so I bit the bullet and decided to upgrade, resign and get the Samsung Galaxy S4. Amazing phone I must say but one week into having it, just when I got used to the device and downloaded all the apps, I dropped that phone through the crack of a table, smashing it on the ground. I guess I didn't knock on enough wood when I protested how in all my years I had never broken a single phone. Luckily I am able to get a replacement but that meant four days straight without a phone. After the initial separation anxiety and grieving of my lost pictures and conversations I decided what better time to disconnect myself from having something attached to me at all times.
There are certain things you realize when you don't have your phone anymore that seem like big problems which become unimportant after a few days. For the first twenty four hours here were my first world problems I had to deal with:

• How was I going to Snapchat all the pictures of me eating ice cream to people? I found some great deals on ice cream and it's sad that my first thought was to take a picture and send my find to someone. (I did buy two boxes of Drumsticks and a box of 24 Fudgesicles in case you wanted to know)
• How was I going to continue the everlasting ongoing text messages that I had going on? Some of these were very important conversations that I no longer was able to continue.
• How would I Instagram my selfies of me doing nonsense things like making dinner on the BBQ? 
• How would I check in to all the non important places I went to on the weekend on Facebook?
• How was I going to survive a bus ride without my playlist of music?
• How was I going to check my daily horoscope?
• How was I going to check the weather for today, tomorrow or next week in Ottawa or a random city? (I did get poured on today not knowing it was going to rain)
• How was I going to set my alarm in the morning for work? I don't have an actual clock in my room anymore.
• How was I going to get all my pictures off of my phone? (They were pretty dumb ones but still)
• How was someone going to call me (Let's face it my total talk time in a month is maybe ten minutes)
• How was I going to make plans to meet up with people and know if either one of us would show or be late?

After a day or two these things became so irrelevant in my life. I still have a computer so I still have Facebook. Anyone that matters knows how to get a hold of me through Facebook or email and they have. So today I woke up for day one of work without my phone and it was amazing how many things are different without it. I loaded up an Ipod shuffle because I can't live without my music and set on my way. Here are some things I noticed without having a phone:

• The moment I walked out the door I had three construction guys on my street say hi to me all in a row.
• My Ipod is so much lighter than a phone and easily fit in my pocket, freeing up my hands for my purse and bus pass without me being all awkward.
• The bus driver actually said hello and smiled at me this morning.
• I may have danced at the bus stop listening to Fleetwood Mac's Sweet Little Lies and am now obsessed with the song.
• I paid attention to people. There was one woman doing make up on the bus, one reading a book, a man outside cutting hedges on the sidewalk side of his property, a mom with her child on a slide at the park. It was the people watching I love to do.
• I realized how boring my job really can be without the extra distraction at my desk. This could be a very good or very bad thing.
• I started looking at vintage clothing, looking into my dreams, reading the news. Stuff I used to care about.
• I stopped looking for my phone, waiting for text messages, deleting junk emails. All the things that waste so much time in my day.
• My phone does have a voice activated command thing. I finally used it and realized I can set my alarm, send and receive text messages and call her a whore when she doesn't do what I ask, but then she tells me to come back when I feel like being nicer and that she doesn't understand when I say goodbye forever alone. 

At the end of the day I'm not completely disconnected from the social aspects of technology, they just have to be done at a different pace. I have noticed there is more time in the day and that I am generally at peace without my phone. Tomorrow the new one comes in and I may just treat it a little different than before.

I may just want to wear my jean jacket, pretend it's 1987 and listen to Little Lies on a plain old Sony Walkman.

What Are The Hardest Things To Ask Yourself?

A few months ago I sat alone in my apartment and was really trying to figure out my life. Maybe I think too much. I just wanted to find out some answers to things I couldn't comprehend. Why were people treating me a certain way? What did I really need in life? What direction did I want to take? These are all questions that popped in my head but they didn't really get down to the core of who I am inside.
One of the hardest things to do is to be honest with yourself, look inside your mind and heart and then write down some answers that you truly believe in. Not answers you think people would want to read. Answers that challenge yourself. I wrote down five questions in a journal. These questions seemed simple until I wrote them down. The key is to write all five out, leaving spaces for your answers, just like an English test in high school. The words on the paper scared me, haunted me and were extremely challenging to answer. I actually took a couple days filling in my blank lines until there staring back at me was exactly what I was looking for. Here was my key to finding my own happiness, I was realizing things that I did and didn't want in my life and things that I could be proud of. It was a very freeing experience and I still think about these questions every day.

I challenge people to try this out and see what you can learn about yourself.
Here are the questions:

1. What are you good at?
2. What do you like about yourself?
3. What do you dislike about yourself?
4. What makes you truly happy?
5. What makes you sad or angry?

I've passed it on to a couple of friends and hopefully they were able to gain some good insight to themselves. Maybe you can too.